Questions - A Spoken Word

i am so good at asking questions
you see, my inquiring a bout the meaning
of things is just an expression
of my disbelief in things unseen.
i don't have all the answers and i
never will. Its just that every
thing you have said simply can't be true.
Some where there is a flaw. and well my
pride just can't take being wrong. So if he
is my God, won't he answer me too?

I need answers. Not just some kind of
blind faith to fol low. I need some thing
to cling to. An anchor. I need love.
I need to know i am loved. Some thing.
And He says i am loved but -- your closest
friends the ones who knew you best
abandoned you, denied you, left you to die.
How is that your kind of love? They chose
to deny you. And what does that say
was their devotion to you -- a lie?

I have so many questions for you.
Like how am i supposed to believe
that a young little girl knew how to
raise the one true God? How could she give
birth to the creator? What could she
teach the omniscient? How does any of
it make sense? And your first big sign was
to turn water to wine? I can't believe the small things...
Struggle with the love things.
And I need real answers because!

I am human. OK.
May be I don't need all the answers.
May be i just need to read some more.
But if I'm going to follow we're
going to have to get one thing clear.
There is one thing I will never
under stand. One thing that will never be
under stood. If i give up my fears
I follow you believe all you've done...
I still have this question: Why love me?


written for Mosaic Nashville